22 March 2012

Love and Death

I recently wrote this article, which will soon be published by Universidad de San Francisco de Quito's academic journal LiberArte. (It's a bit of a play on words in Spanish between "Liberal Arts" and "Liberate yourself"). Every year they pick a different offbeat theme, and this year's is Harry Potter. So, this is what I wrote! Coming (very) soon: more musings and updates about my recent adventures in living.

“You think the dead we loved ever truly leave us?”
–Albus Dumbledore
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban[1]

As Geordie Greig astutely points out in his 2006 article for the British newspaper The Telegraph, “Death is the key to understanding [Harry Potter author] J K Rowling. Her greatest fear - and she is completely unhesitant about this - is of someone she loves dying.”[2] He goes on to quote Rowling, “My books are largely about death. They open with the death of Harry's parents. There is Voldemort's obsession with conquering death and his quest for immortality at any price, the goal of anyone with magic. I so understand why Voldemort wants to conquer death. We're all frightened of it.”[3] Rowling also shares tearfully that she was conjuring the first words of Harry Potter the night her mother died.[4] Perhaps not surprisingly, then, the internationally best-selling book series centers largely on two themes of human (and wizard) life: death and love.
In this article I explore Rowling’s portrayal of death in the Harry Potter series, comparing and contrasting death in the wizarding world with the conceptions of death in the runa[5] (Indigenous) culture of the Northern Andean Highlands of Ecuador. While the analysis of Harry’s world is obviously gleaned primarily from the books themselves, the perspective on Indigenous views is based on ethnographic research I conducted during Finados/Día de los Difuntos[6] in the communities of Cotacachi and Quiroga in November 2011, as well as on textual study of relevant ethnographic and primary source documents.
At first blush, the worlds of Harry Potter and the runakuna of Cotacachi do not seem very similar. In most ways, perhaps, they are not. It may even seem frivolous or offensive to compare them. Respectfully recognizing the inherent differences between a culture with ancient roots and historically-developed, communally-coherent belief systems, and one woman’s fanciful fictional creation of a world infused with her own disparately-hailing philosophies, there is nonetheless much to glean in the comparison. In terms of notions of death in both worlds, there are some striking parallels, as well as some significant differences. There is a fundamentally similar concept that unites these two worldviews: only love is able to bridge the divide between death and life. The extent to which love can bridge that divide, however, is another question. In Harry Potter, only shadows of the dead can continue to exist independently, and the dead live on only in our minds and hearts. The line between death and life is fairly solid in Harry’s world, despite the various ways in which the dead can live on as ghosts, in life-like interactive paintings, or in charmed visions such as Patronuses.[7] In Kichwa Indigenous culture, the line is more fluid.  There is an interpenetrating, ongoing relationship between the realms of the living and dead. The continuous care for the dead keeps them alive. It is only those who are forgotten that are ever considered truly dead.
In my field notes from the day I spent in the cemeteries of Cotacachi and Quiroga, I note the very ordinariness of the time I shared with my friends there. Spending the day squatting on graves in the searing sun, I did not see much of the miraculous, per se. It was a rather normal day. We perched ourselves where we could, and talked a little. But mostly we just sat, sometimes in conversation, sometimes in silence, sometimes in laughter. We ate communal food produced from seemingly fathomless cloth bundles—like Mary Poppins’ magical bag, but full of nothing but potatoes, hominy, and fava beans. Plates of mote, habas, and papas[8] were passed around continuously, along with flimsy plastic cups filled with sugary soda, and steaming bowls of colada de churo.[9] There were green-skinned bananas with sweet orange flesh—the bananas that Magui said were her dad’s favorite, and the bread we had baked the night before in the big clay oven.[10] Women and girls came by our little encampment to deposit food into our bundles, and were given piles of food in return. Elderly women recited the Our Father and in exchange their aprons were filled with bananas and bread. I guess I thought there might be more conversing, or ritual with those who were departed. But it was more like just hanging out. Maybe a perfect example of the porousness that the runa see between life and death. The cemetery was absolutely filled with people and flowers. There was prayer. It was undeniably a special day. But it was also just a day for hanging out with beloved ones both alive and dead. Time with family. Like any other day.
In Ritual Encounters: Otavalan Modern and Mythic Community, anthropologist Michelle Wibbelsman writes about a similar experience on Día de los Difuntos in the nearby community of Ilumán.
Eventually, Carmen called over three rezadoras (prayer experts). For each prayer they said, she deposited a small bowlful of food into their plastic bags, alternating occasionally with a couple of bananas or rosquitas…The rezadoras prayed in a cacophonous mixture of Spanish and Quichua.[11] Their voices came together in unison only upon reciting, “Our Father,” “Hail Mary,” and “Glory Be…” in Spanish…

There was a lack of solemnity in all of these proceedings. The oration of the rezadora receded to the background as Mamita Carmen chatted with me about the babies who had died, and as the children played in unrestrained voices with the collectible Pokemon game pieces (tasos). The result was a dissonant mix of “virgin santísima, madre de Dios…,” clashing Pokemon battle noises, and the children’s laughter. The rezadora interrupted her monotone recitation to hack and spit. Later, she snatched a fly in midair and crushed it with a stone against the dirt of the burial mound. All the while, she continued to pray. Difuntos are said to enjoy partaking in the laughter and conversation of the living.[12]

Like I was, Wibbelsman is struck by the casualness and fluidity of this important ritual day. Wibbelsman attributes this to three primary factors: that the dead are said to return periodically throughout the year[13] (not just for Finados),[14] that the day-to-day experiences with sickness and death in Indigenous communities render death a more quotidian part of life,[15] and the belief in the Indigenous worldview of interpenetrating realms of existence.
Wibbelsman helpfully places her observations about the culture of the runakuna within the theoretical framework of the chakana—sometimes called the “Andean cross”—a sacred symbol of interconnectedness in the Indigenous universe (or “pariverse”)[16] and a sort of cosmic crossroads, connecting the sacred and the profane and all realms of time-space. As Indigenous Otavalan anthropologist and philosopher Luis Enrique “Katsa” Cachiguango explains, Andean wisdom unites the universe of the four worlds, or pachas: hawa-pacha (the world of above, the sky, or the “macrocosmos”), uku-pacha (the world of below, mystery, “microcosmos”), kay-pacha (the world in which we co-exist as nature, human beings, divinities, and ancestors), and chaysuk-pacha (the spiritual world of the dead, the ancestors who are always with us).[17] Wibbelsman states it more simply: “Continual interchange among people, and also with the realms of nature, the divine, and the dead, lies at the heart of Otavalan collective experience.”[18] In the case of the dead, the exchange between realms manifests itself primarily through food, as the living family members visit their deceased relatives and engage in what are essentially ritualized picnics on their graves. The dead soul is considered much like a living one, with need for affection, food, and conversation. In fact, “The dead depend upon the living for nourishment, conversation, and creativity that will literally keep them alive.”[19] The interconnection between the living and the dead is such that the realms require one another to function, as the dead rely upon the living for physical and emotional nourishment, and the living rely upon the dead for protection, love, and spiritual nourishment.
Contemporary burial practices also reflect this notion of interconnection. As Wibblesman’s compadre Segundo explained to her,
“First you have to put a little plate and a little wooden spoon.” Food must also be included—an orange, an egg, and bread. Carmen added that one must send two or three changes of clothes, and needle and thread so that the deceased will be able to mend their garments. Sewn into the shirt, so that difunto does not lose it, should be some change…Carmen explained, “para el pasaje” (for the fare).[20]

We do not know very much about Indigenous religious traditions prior to the arrival of the Incas, because the historical records that we have do not distinguish between the pre-Incan and Incan traditions, considering everything pre-Spanish and pre-Catholic to be barbaric.[21] One thing that is clear is that the veneration of the dead was central to Andean religious practice. The dead were mummified and kept in caves, where people would come to converse and supplicate, but also to bring food, clothes, money, and chicha, as the dead were said to experience thirst, hunger, cold, and all the physical needs that we have as living beings.[22]
            In sharp contrast to the Indígenas’ interactions with their dead are the mestizo practices. In my experience in the cemetery, there was a striking difference between the quiet mestizo side of the cemetery—where elegant stone gravestones stood solemnly and permanently—and the dirt plots with wooden crosses on the Indigenous side. As Wibbelsman notes, “In the segregated cemeteries of the area, mestizo gravesites are unkempt, weeds overwhelming the headstones—telltale signs of rare visits. I ask Mamita Carmen about this and she tells me that the mishus[23] only visit on Finados.”[24] Carmen does not approve of this, and tells Wibbelsman that the mishus’ lack of interaction with their dead is neglectful. Wibbelsman helpfully notes that the differences in practices on either side of the segregated cemetery are not just due to differing beliefs about the dead, but also point to fundamentally different understandings and experiences with memory.
Among mestizos, remembering the dead involves rousing disembodied recollections through the mnemonic triggers of dates and names inscribed on headstones. Among indígenas, the dead are not considered shadows of people from the past but contemporaries. Visits to the cemetery are less acts of commemoration than they are rituals of communion and family gathering.[25]

For the Indigenous, their dead are not truly dead, but co-existing with them. The care they show to their deceased family members keeps them alive, whereas the souls of mestizos they regard as “‘muertos de a de veras’(really dead).”[26] In other words, only love, and specifically, embodied love, is able to bridge the divide between death and life. Without that connection, the dead truly die.
            J.K. Rowling’s wizarding England is indeed far from the Indigenous culture of the Andean Highlands in many ways, but there are certain concepts that resonate, especially that of the role of love in connecting the realms of the living and the dead. Starting simply in our comparison, in Harry’s world, like in the world of the runa, the soul survives bodily death.[27] In Harry’s world, however, this does not mean that the souls are necessarily physically present on earth, although there are various ways in which Rowling depicts the dead on earth, including as ghosts and visions. In his article “The Soul in Harry Potter,” Scott Sehon describes another form in which the dead appear: “the semi-ghostly condition in which Harry twice sees his departed loved ones.”[28] In Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Harry’s parents and other beloved deceased friends are issued out of Voldemort’s wand as Harry and he share an intense wand connection. They are more corporeal than ghosts, and Harry’s father even talks to him and helps him to escape from Voldemort.
Similarly, when Harry uses the Resurrection Stone in Deathly Hallows he sees Sirius, Remus Lupin, and his parents, and it seems that they are again, at least in some sense, real. Less substantial than living bodies and here only temporarily, they are nonetheless not mere ghosts, they are described as ‘neither ghost nor truly flesh.’[29]

 There are many forms in which the dead continue to exist in the world painted by J.K. Rowling. However, despite these many manifestations of the deceased, for Rowling it is clear that death is final, and that Voldemort’s quest to avoid it is perverse. “‘No spell can reawaken the dead,’” Dumbledore tells Harry and his godfather Sirius Black after the death of Cedric Diggory.[30]
Indeed, one of the primary themes that Rowling delineates is that accepting death is an important part of life. In one of his characteristic moments of wisdom, Professor Dumbledore assures Harry that “‘to the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.’”[31] When Harry asks Nearly-Headless Nick (a resident ghost at Hogwarts) how he is able to still hang around five centuries after his death, Nick “tells him, sadly, that the only reason he has remained is because he feared death too much, and failed to go on as he should. Because of this, he is ‘neither here nor there.’”[32] Of course, Voldemort’s fear of death is a central plot element for the Potter series, as Voldemort goes to such lengths to “master” the unavoidable human fate of bodily death. Voldemort’s killing curse directed at the infant Harry Potter backfired on him, killing Voldemort instead. He remained alive, however, because he had split his soul into various horcruxes—fragments of himself that were embedded into many physical objects, one animal (his snake Nagini), and one human being: Harry Potter. Rowling shows that to do so, Voldemort must compromise his own soul, rendering him a ghastly, featureless creature that feeds on others’ life-forces in order to remain alive. In his quest to conquer death, Voldemort becomes more and more twisted and evil. In Harry’s world it is only through accepting death as part of life that one can begin to “master” it. As Harry prepares to face death in order to defeat Voldemort and his followers (the Death Eaters), Dumbledore once again assures him, “You are the true master of death, because the true master does not seek to run away from Death. He accepts that he must die, and understands that there are far, far worse things in the living world than dying.”[33]
Ultimately it is Harry’s love for others that renders him willing to face death. He accepts that he must die in order that others might live. In this way, he is depicted as truly “mastering” death—facing its reality and inevitability with love. Likewise, his parents died to save his life, sacrificing themselves when the powerful wizard attempted to kill their infant son. When Harry and Hermione find Harry’s parents’ grave in Godric’s Hollow, Harry is surprised by the verse that is carved into their headstone: “The last enemy that shall be destroyed in death.”[34] Harry interprets this as precisely the perverse view of death that Voldemort and his followers, the aptly-named Death Eaters, espouse. But “Hermione assures him, “It doesn’t mean defeating death in the way the Death Eaters mean it, Harry…It means…you know…living beyond death.”[35] It is through their love that Harry’s parents, and Harry himself, will be able to “defeat” death, to render it something that need not be feared.
This acceptance of death as part of life has obvious parallels to the Indigenous cosmovision that sees death as an intersecting realm of life. As Luis Enrique Cachiguango states, the world of chaysuk-pacha (death, the ancestors) is intimately connected with the world in which we live as human beings—kay-pacha.[36] In Harry’s world, however, the line between the living and dead is more final, and the acceptance of death as part of life is more metaphysical, and less literal. As the runa celebrate with their dead, feasting and talking, “friendship between Harry and his mates and his interaction with Dumbledore often involve eating (or, really, feasting), games, and affectionate exchanges of gifts.”[37] The recognition of embodied love as perhaps the most important aspect of life is present in Harry Potter, but this recognition does not extend to the realm of the dead. The love that Harry feels for his parents, his godfather Sirius, Dumbledore, and other beloved deceased remains spiritual/emotional, as opposed to embodied/physical.
Although the perceptions of the permeability of the line between death and life differ, the philosophies of Harry Potter and the runakuna both see the dead as existing in a different realm. In the Chamber of Secrets, Harry encounters a “veil”, and the dead are said to go beyond it.[38] When Harry willingly sacrifices himself to Voldemort in order to save his people, he finds himself in King’s Cross Station, surrounded by bright white light. There he finds Dumbledore waiting for him on the platform, and when Harry asks where the train waiting in the station would take him, Dumbledore simply says, “on.” Rowling doesn’t detail where that “on” might be, or how one gets there, but it is obvious that is a journey to another realm, “to the other side.”[39] Likewise, when Michelle Wibblesman asks Mamita Carmen why the dead must be buried with money, Carmen says simply and a bit ambiguously, ‘por el pasaje (the fare)’—implying a similar journey to another realm of life, perhaps in a boat, a bus, or a train like the one awaiting Harry in King’s Cross Station.
Despite the differences in worldviews between J.K. Rowling’s depiction of wizarding England and the Indigenous culture of the Northern Andean Highlands of Ecuador, the fundamental notion that unites these worlds is that love is the only force able to bridge the divide between death and life. In both worlds, it is only those who are forgotten who are ever truly dead, as those whom we love continue to influence our lives even in their death. In Harry Potter, however, the line between death and life is more permanent—only shadows of the dead can continue to exist independently, and the dead live on only in our minds and hearts. We must accept death as part of life and accept its finality in order to coexist emotionally with those we love. In Kichwa Indigenous culture, the line is more fluid. Death is real, but the continuous bodily and emotional care for the dead keeps them literally alive. There is an interpenetrating, ongoing relationship between the realms of the living and dead.
The paradigms represented by the literary world of Harry Potter and the quotidian, embodied spirituality of the runakuna both exemplify an important lesson about life: death is not something to be feared, but an integral part of our lives as human beings (even magical ones). Death is its own mysterious realm, but by continuing to love those who have passed from our lives into that realm, we can sustain them, defeating death through love in a way that Voldemort, in his twisted quest for unnatural immortality never can. Perhaps memory is the “magic” that can defeat death. Whether through the embodied rituals of Indigenous families, or through the sustained love of Harry and his friends, we keep ourselves and our departed alive through memory. Mircaea Eliade writes, “The dead are those who have lost their memories.”[40] As we continue to cherish those we love, their memories and ours are sustained, filling us with the breath of life, allowing us to live as beings truly alive, and to dwell side-by-side with our sisters and brothers who continue to live in another dimension of existence, “beyond the veil.”





[1] All Harry Potter books referenced in this article are the United States Scholastic editions, and will be referred to only by title. Rowling, J.K. Harry Potter and Prisoner of Azkaban, (New York: Scholastic Inc, 1999), 22
[2] Greig, Geordie. “There would be so much to tell her…” The Telegraph. 10 Jan 2006. Web.
[3] Ibid.

[4] Iggulden, Amy. “Exclusive interview with J K Rowling: Harry Potter was born the day my mother died,” The Telegraph. 10 Jan 2006. Web.

[5] The Indigenous people of Ecuador’s Andean highlands often refer to themselves as runa or runakuna, runa meaning simply “people” in the Kichwa language, and -kuna being the plural suffix in Kichwa.
[6] Finados/Día de los Difuntos is a national holiday throughout Ecuador, celebrated November 2.
[7]‘A Patronus is a kind of positive force, and for the wizard who can conjure one, it works something like a shield, with the Dementor feeding on it, rather than him. In order for it to work, you need to think of a memory. Not just any memory, a very happy memory, a very powerful memory… Allow it to fill you up...lose yourself in it...then speak the incantation ‘Expecto Patronum.’’—Remus Lupin teaching Harry Potter the Patronus Charm,” from “Patronus Charm,” Harry Potter Wiki, n.d. Web. <http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Patronus_Charm>
[8] Boiled hominy, fava beans, and potatoes; some of the most traditional staple foods of the “Sierra” (Andean highlands).
[9] Another traditional food of the highlands Indigenous culture, particularly during the season of Finados. It is essentially a soup prepared by boiling corn meal with achiote [a red seed, also known as “annatto” in the English-speaking world] and adding little snails collected in fresh water areas, marinated in lemon juice, salt, and cilantro.
[10] Making “guaguas [wawas] de pan” is another custom during Finados in Ecuador. Dough is sculpted into anthropomorphic shapes (wawa means child in Kichwa and in common Ecuadoran Spanish), horses, birds, spirals, wreaths, and circles, baked into bread, and  shared with family and friends.
[11] Wibbelsman uses the older spelling “Quichua,” but the current correct spelling is “Kichwa” (For more information on the systematization of Kichwa language and orthography--“kichwa unificado,” see <kichwa.net>).
[12] Wibbelsman, Michelle. Ritual Encounters: Otavalan Modern and Mythic Community. (Urbana: University of Illinois Press, 2009),126
[13] Wibbelsman, 112
[14] “In addition to their correlation with the four major holidays, ritual visits to the cemetery in Otavalo and Cotacachi take place son Mondays and Thursdays every week. The importance among Runakuna of sustaining contact with the ancestors in underscored by the frequency of these visits. They challenge the assumption of a clearly delimited holiday, revealing instead a familiar day-to-day interaction among the living and the dead.” Wibbelsman, 114
[15] Wibbelsman, 112
[16] The term “Pariverso” represents the Indigenous understanding of complementarity in all aspects of the cosmos. See Pakarina: El Ritual Andino de Nacimiento y Crianza de Niños y Niñas en Cotacachi, (Cruz Roja Ecuatoriana, Junta Provincial de Imbabura) ed. Luis Enrique Cachiguango, 22 
[17] Full quote in Spanish: “La sabiduría andina plasmada en las distintas tecnologías para la vida, tanto en su dimensión práctica como en su dimensión religiosa, unifica el universo de los cuatro mundos o cuatro pachas. En todas las tecnologías de la producción entran a formar parte el hawa-pacha o el mundo de arriba, el cielo o el macrocosmos. También toma parte el uku-pacha, el mundo de abajo, el mundo del misterio, el microcosmos. El kay pacha, este mundo presente en que convivimos la naturaleza, los seres humanos, las divinidades y los ancestros. Finalmente también forma parte de este universo el chayshuk-pacha, el mundo espiritual de los muertos, ancestros que siempre nos acompañan y nos ayudan a seguir criando la chakra como actividad de plena realización humana que sobrepasa la dimensión occidental del trabajo occidental.” From Cachiguango, Luis Enrique. Ñukanchik Sumak MurukunaNuestros Alimentos Sagrados, 1
[18] Wibbelsman, 2
[19] Ibid.,123-124
[20] Wibbelsman, 127
[21] Andrade, Susana. Protestantismo Indígena, (Quito: Abya-Yala, 2004), 71
[22] Andrade, 77
[23] Kichwa term for mestizos
[24] Wibbelsman, 132
[25] Wibbelsman, 135
[26] Ibid., 132
[27]“’Look, if I picked up a sword right now, Ron, and ran you through with it, I wouldn’t damage your soul at all.’ ‘Which would be a real comfort to me, I’m sure,’ said Ron. Harry laughed. ‘It should be, actually! But my point is that whatever happens to your body, your soul will survive, untouched,’ said Hermione.” Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, 104
[28] Sehon, Scott. “The Soul in Harry Potter,” The Ultimate Harry Potter and Philosophy: Hogwarts for Muggles, ed. Gregory Bassham, (Hoboken, New Jersey: John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 2010), 12 
[29] Ibid., 12 -13
[30] Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 36
[31] Harry Potter and Sorcerer’s Stone, 17
[32] Spillsbury, Paul. “Love and Death in Harry Potter,” The Harry Potter Lexicon. 2006. Web. <http://www.hp-lexicon.org/essays/essay-love-and-death.html>
[33] Jonathan L. Walls and Jerry L. Walls. “Beyond Godric’s Hollow: Life After Death and Search for Meaning,” The Ultimate Harry Potter and Philosophy: Hogwarts for Muggles, ed. Gregory Bassham, (Hoboken, New Jersey: John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 2010), 234
[34] Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, 328
[35] from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, as quoted in Jonathan L. Walls and Jerry L. Walls. “Beyond Godric’s Hollow: Life After Death and Search for Meaning,” The Ultimate Harry Potter and Philosophy: Hogwarts for Muggles, ed. Gregory Bassham, (Hoboken, New Jersey: John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 2010), 248
[36] Cachiguango, Luis Enrique. Ñukanchik Sumak MurukunaNuestros Alimentos Sagrados.
[37] Jonathan L. Walls and Jerry L. Walls. “Beyond Godric’s Hollow: Life After Death and Search for Meaning,” The Ultimate Harry Potter and Philosophy: Hogwarts for Muggles, ed. Gregory Bassham, (Hoboken, New Jersey: John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 2010), 238
[38] Spillsbury, Paul. “Love and Death in Harry Potter,” The Harry Potter Lexicon. 2006. Web.
[39]Sehon, Scott. “The Soul in Harry Potter,” The Ultimate Harry Potter and Philosophy: Hogwarts for Muggles, ed. Gregory Bassham, (Hoboken, New Jersey: John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 2010), 12-13
[40] as quoted in Wibbelsman, 132

06 March 2012

a Lake and a Baptism


Last weekend I made a spontaneous journey to Quilotoa, a volcanic crater lake in the central Andean highlands. On some other business, I had already come to Quito, from where it is much easier to get a bus to anywhere in the country, so I decided I should just go. My friend Mary and I had talked about going to the edge of the Amazon to meet up with some friends from her program, so I had packed rainforest-type attire when I left for Quito a few days earlier. But Mary discovered that none of her friends were going to be home that weekend, so I proposed a trip to Quilotoa instead. The only problem is that Quilotoa is frigid, particularly compared to the balmy, sticky weather in the Oriente [term for the Amazonian region of Ecuador—it means literally “the East,” because the Amazon covers the eastern portion of Ecuadoran territory]. So I stuffed as many layers as I had into my backpack, borrowed a rain jacket from my friend Michelle, and we headed out.
We arrived in Latacunga around 7 pm on Friday, and began to search for the cheap hostel recommended by the handy crinkled copy of Lonely Planet that I have on loan. A police officer who apparently was not too map-savvy pointed us in the wrong direction, and we walked for about half an hour in the exact opposite way that we should have, until we just grabbed a taxi and asked the driver to take us to the address. We arrived, to find an old mansion, abandoned, with a dark courtyard, and two tiers of rooms with gaping black doorways. Immediately replaying horror films in our minds, we dashed out of there and went to inquire about the hostel at a corner store. After a serpentine search, we finally found their new location, checked in, and went pretty promptly to sleep in the big dormitory full of fellow would-be hikers.
We woke up early, had a complimentary breakfast of juice and tea, and were about to dash out the door to try to catch a 7:30 am bus to Zumbahua. But we ended up teaming up with an Australian woman who had been sleeping in the bunk below me, and waiting for her before heading out. The bus terminal was a confusing mess—with seemingly every bus driver telling us (or rather yelling at us) that they could get us where we needed to go the fastest. In the end, we found a bus that went directly to Quilotoa itself, and sat waiting on it for over an hour before it finally left.
The bus ride was stunning, winding around two-lane highways that cut through emerald hills. It was like traversing a patchwork quilt of gems—squares of gold, peridot: deep greens, light greens, browns, yellows, golds—all dotted with bits of white fluff—sheep, and their elegant shepherdesses, dressed in black velvet skirts, white kneesocks, black heels, fedoras, and brightly colored cardigans or shawls of deep magenta or vivid turquoise. Sometimes the lush hills would be interrupted by unexpected patches of pale dirt and sculptural cacti, and herds of handsome black and white cows would amble by.
We finally arrived in Quilotoa, which is not much more than a street with a few buildings, and hopped off the bus with our new Australian friend, straight into a fog bank. We could hardly see anything, and were wondering where the lake itself might be, when all of a sudden it emerged from behind a rocky ledge, and I gasped. I had seen photos of the deep turquoise water filling that profound crater, and the beauty of the photos had convinced me to visit. But I was not prepared for how much more beautiful it was in person. The locals say that Quilotoa is bottomless, and looking out into its quiet depths, I certainly could see what that meant. Its ancient stillness kept drawing me: dwarfing the human experience, defying my sense of time.


After ogling the lake for a bit, we started to hike around its perimeter, stopping frequently to take more photos, and turning around after we found ourselves wandering in a dense, impenetrable fog for half an hour.
 


          When we got back to the trailhead, we stumbled upon a friend from Mary’s program—Nick! He was finishing up a little picnic lunch on the side of the bluff with his fleeting companion—a Japanese harmonica musician who lives in Paris. Michelle and Mary and I began to hike down into the crater, and Nick told us he would meet us there after he washed his dishes. We slowly made our way down the steep incline until we reached the shore—about an hour and a half later. There we wandered around a bit, and reconvened with Nick, who told us he had a tent, and that we were welcome to stay with him that night if we wanted. We figured it would be an adventure, so we said yes, started gathering brush to make a campfire, and finding a spot to camp. We set up the tent, tried (unsuccessfully) to make a fire in the extremely damp drizzly grass, and started making dinner—rice and sautéed vegetables. It took about 3 hours to boil all the rice. While we were making dinner, a worried man came running to the edge of the bluff where we were camped and told us that two of his friends had gotten lost in the dense fog while they were kayaking across the lake. We did what we could to look for them, and lent him a flashlight to shine while he yelled their names desperately. Eventually the fog cleared, and their little yellow kayak came into focus. We watched happily as they were rescued.
That night we ate our delicious dinner, huddled around the small fire (it did finally light), and Nick read aloud to us from Rushdie’s Midnight’s Children. Then Mary and Nick played a game of backgammon, while I tried to figure out various bodily contortions that would keep me as close as possible to the warm glowing embers of our dying fire. At this point, the true meaning of 0 degrees Celsius and no warm clothes was starting to sink in. We all put on every piece of clothing we had, laid Nick’s sleeping bag on the ground (he had no ground cloth, so the cold seeping in from the ground was worse than the air) and all lay shivering on top of the one sleeping bag for the whole night, sleeping fitfully for periods of time before waking again to check our watches, desperately hoping that the sun would come out soon. It finally did, and staring out at this breathtaking lake on whose shore we had camped, we groggily stretched our stiff limbs, jumped around the campsite trying to warm ourselves in the weak morning sun, and cleaned up. We all agreed it was probably the most beautiful place we had ever camped. We made the torturous uphill climb back to town, bought Nick a small overpriced breakfast as a thank you for his hospitality, and said farewell, as he started off to trek to the next town. Mary and I got a truck to take us to Zumbahua, where there are supposedly buses to Latacunga every thirty minutes. Of course, we waited on the bus forever before it actually left, and we napped most of the way to Latacunga, where we caught a bus to Quito. After a brief stop in Quito to have tea with some friends and collect my laptop and other things that I had left at Monica’s apartment, we took the bus back up north to our little community.

Good Morning, Quilotoa!
This past weekend was also really fun, in a very different way. Saturday was our friend Mishari’s baptism, so Friday we helped with the party prep, peeling potatoes and stringing decorations from the rafters on the patio. Saturday at 6 am we headed out for the church, and all took lots of photos of Mishari all dressed up in her brand new anako (the traditional dress for Indigenous women in this region—a long dark wool wrap-around skirt, a white lacy blouse hand-embroidered with flowers, an intricately woven faja pulled tight around the waist, a shawl or fachalina secured around the shoulders, a tiered gold bead necklace, tight coral beaded bracelets on each wrist, black velvet alpargates, and a long ponytail with a cinta wrapped tightly around it). After the baptismal water was cupped gently on the crown of her head, a white cloth was tied around her head. Following the ceremony, we all hopped in the back of a big truck and headed back to the house, where the party began at 8 am with steaming bowls of soup passed around for breakfast. 

Baptism

La Mishari

Mishari taking off her shoes for the ritual
After mingling and eating for a bit, Magui and a few others began to set up a ritual space in the courtyard, placing dirt, water, fire, and an empty bowl signifying air, in a circle, with a bowl with an egg in the middle. Mishari was asked to take off her shoes, and she was walked around the circle a few times. All the elements were invoked, and Magui gave a teary speech asking us to help her to raise her daughter, to care for the earth, and to help keep her daughter away from the temptations of substance abuse and other problems that affect youth these days. Then Magui and the godparents (Ines and Rodrigo) were invited to place water and rose petals on Mishari’s head, as a blessing, and anyone else who wanted to ritually commit to helping to raise Mishari was invited to come place water on her head, as well. After this, some of the men got their instruments—guitars and mandolins and drums and flutes--and we all did a circle dance in honor of the ceremony. Rhythmically stomping my feet around in that dirt, in time with the now-so-familiar tunes of traditional Andean music, I felt tears spring to my eyes, as I realized how much I will miss this place and this culture and these people. There is something so beautiful and simple about that dance—its circular movement like the movement of the seasons and the stars and the sun and the moon, rooted in the earth, stomping on her to remind her that we are here, and that we appreciate all she does to keep us alive. Circling the representations of the elements, without which we would not have life.

elements

ritual

music
The party went on for another 36 hours. There was dancing and food and soon lots and lots of beer, which I had to resolutely refuse lest I end up a sloppy mess like the other toppling guests soon were. I learned that “No, thank you” sounds a bit nonsensical to them, as “thank you” is always interpreted as "yes." So soon I abandoned my translated politesse, and started giving firm No’s. After about 13 hours at the party, I went home to sleep, unfortunately waking in the night to find that I had become horribly ill. I spent all of Sunday in bed, while the party raged on. I was viscerally reminded that there is nothing like being sick to make you miss your momma, so I called my parents, made myself some electrolyte water, and read between bouts of fitful sleep. For the worriers among you, I will assure you that I am now feeling just dandy, although it was rough for a couple of days there.             

And, finally, a little Neruda (an excerpt from Past):

and each new day
it gleams
like an empty
plate.
There is nothing, there is always nothing.
It has to be filled
with a new, fruitful
space,
then downward
tumbles yesterday
as in a well
falls yesterday's water,
into the cistern
of all still without voice or fire.
It is difficult to teach bones
to disappear,
to teach eyes
to close
but
we do it
unrealizing.
It was all alive,
alive, alive, alive
like a scarlet fish
but time
passed over its dark cloth
and the flash of the fish
drowned and disappeared.
Water water water
the past goes on falling
still a tangle
of bones
and of roots;
it has been, it has been, and now
memories mean nothing.
Now the heavy eyelid
covers the light of the eye
and what was once living
now no longer lives;
what we were, we are not.
And with words, although the letters
still have transparency and sound,
they change, and the mouth changes;
the same mouth is now another mouth;
they change, lips, skin, circulation;
another being has occupied our skeleton;
what once was in us now is not.